Gearing Up

Yesterday was the first time I met with my oncologist, Dr. Dendulure. When I noticed her credentials included Louisiana State University, I smiled. An LA doctor! She was great, and really put us at ease. Unfortunately, she couldn’t give me a lot of the answers I’m still looking for; it’s really only after surgery that those will be answered. It was odd squeezing in three doctors appointments between picking up my wedding dress and getting party supplies, but such is life. I’m learning to roll with it. 

After my appointment, my mom and I called my uncle as Dr. D had requested the pathology report of my Maw Maw who passed away almost 4 years ago from cancer. There are lots of suspicions around hereditary cancer since I’m so young. SO YOUNG. That’s what all the doctors keep telling me. One of the nice perks of having cancer at 35, an age that previously had me feeling SO OLD. Anyway, we were both totally in shock when we learned Maw Maw had breast cancer and apparently ovarian cancer too. We had both been there with her at the end, how did we not know that?

Mom has told me several times that Maw Maw must have been my guardian angel to get me to discover the lump in the first place. But after learning she also had breast cancer, and having Sylvia Sterner be my nurse at the oncologist’s (my Maw Maw’s sister, who also had breast cancer, is Sylvia Stern), I just know it. I miss her especially around Christmas time, since our last Christmas with her (she died early January 2010) was so very special. I must have sang Blue Christmas to her, one of her favorites, a 100 times or over the course of our visit. That song still gets me; I feel like she’s talking to me when it comes on the radio. Funny how songs do that.

I wonder what song will make me remember this weekend. We head to the courthouse tomorrow and the party is on Saturday. It’s been a very stressful week, VERY. So much so that this morning I had to call time-out on errands and such. So I’ve been sitting here in my robe, dad came over and had some coffee with me while Tim tries to catch up on some much-needed sleep. I love my dad so much. He’s a man of not so many words (especially when compared to my mother and sister and I!) but when he does talk, he’s always got such a gift to share. I love those moments with him. I know Tim and I are both particularly looking forward to hearing him on Saturday as he’s unofficially officiating the ceremony. My mom has been such an emotional strength for me since finding out, and my dad is my solid rock. I am truly blessed.

To top that off, I am marrying the world’s greatest and best looking dancer.  I can’t wait to see what he comes up with on Saturday. People regularly start dance offs with him and at some point, inevitably, just kind of shake their head and stand back in amazement. He’s that good. 😉

And as if there is even anything better than all of that, this is now hanging in my house. GOOD GOD I LOVE IT! Dad and I were back and forth between tears and laughs this morning, and he said You just need to remember the things that make you happy. I think this will do!

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